How to spot those who will screw-up as a leader, manager or supervisor

First, two facts. The vast majority of employees who quit their jobs do not leave their company; they leave their boss. The vast majority of leaders, managers and supervisors who are fired, replaced, removed—or who derail—are not deficient in technical skills, expertise or know-how. They are fired, or fail, because of their lack of effective interpersonal skills.

Many of today’s workplaces are deficient in the kind of learning and development that addresses issues of self-discovery, as well as the principles and practices that promote conscious and healthy relationships. Truly knowing yourself, which includes seeking the feedback of others, creates a healthy sense of self-esteem and forms the basis for successful relationships.

It all starts within

Both personal and professional growth require consistent introspection, reflection and a conscious choice to eliminate dysfunctional behaviors: those that negatively affect the workplace atmosphere and so drive down performance, productivity and profits. To do this, you must focus on an exploration of personal beliefs, assumptions, expectations and values about the nature and purpose of work and management.

In today’s business environment, it is interpersonal skills and personal awareness that enable leaders to create a culture that motivates and engages employees — not policies, systems, programs or manuals. Sustainable performance comes only when people know how to talk and relate to one another. No memo, policy or system will ever make up for leaders, managers and supervisors who are deficient in people skills.

Credentials alone won’t cut it

If you’re one of those people who thinks that credentials, technical competency and expertise alone are enough to ensure success and survival, it might be wise to think again.

Leadership demands dealing with people—and doing it well. If you can’t—or won’t—grapple with that, you’ll create a culture characterized by employee disengagement and low commitment, distrust, secrecy, low morale and toxic energy.

My 20 indicators of leadership that will fail

1. Leaders who begin their responses to others’ suggestions or ideas with “no”, “but” or “however.”
2. Leaders who rationalize counter-productive processes, procedures and nonsensical bureaucratic practices by saying: “That’s just the way it is.”
3. Leaders who judge others from a critical, subjective, “Why can’t you be more like me!” perspective.
4. Leaders who become defensive every time someone questions, or is curious about, one of their thoughts, beliefs or decisions.
5. Leaders who immediately argue against or deceive those who don’t agree with them.
6. Leaders who seek to justify actions that are unethical, immoral, or out of integrity because “It’s the only way to do business in a competitive marketplace.”
7. Leaders who admonish those who make mistakes or disagree, and usually to do it in public.
8. Leaders who are emotionally disconnected and distant from colleagues and direct reports.
9. Leaders who are fearful of trying out new ways to think, to “be” and to “do”
10. Leaders who shun creativity and innovation, and urge others to adhere to the “not invented here” syndrome.
11. Leaders who are cold, calculating, emotionally unapproachable and unforgiving of others; the ones who run the show from a “Hey, this is a tough business!” perspective.
12. Leaders who are scattered, unfocused and unbalanced—be it mentally, emotionally or physically.
13. Leaders who shun truth, goodness and justice in favor of expediency, convenience, cutting corners and “making a buck as quickly as possible.”
14. Leaders who compete rather than cooperate with others; who take the “I’m always right” road rather than seek a win-win outcome when conflict arises.
15. Leaders who are a source of weakness, confusion and passing the buck in a stressful and uncertain environment.
16. Leaders who ignore other people’s mental, physical and emotional health and well-being and encourage others to be uncaring as well.
17. Leaders who are rigid, stubborn and inflexible when it comes to considering change and taking risks.
18. Leaders who allow the toxic energy of anger, frustration and anxiety to leak out in conversations and discussions.
19. Leaders who don’t allow time for self-reflection and deeper thinking.
20. Leaders who don’t search for meaning in what they do and communicate to others that purpose and meaning are unimportant.

Exploring whether any of these behaviors describes you is a first step towards self-awareness and growth—and an essential if you want to keep your leadership on track.

Only a “soft skills” exploration, over and above technical expertise and competence, can support effective leadership—unhampered by barriers to a harmonious, pleasant, and productive workplace culture.

This week’s questions for self-reflection

• Do you recognize any of these 20 signs of failing leadership in your interactions with others?
• Has anyone ever tugged on your sleeve about your lack of “people skills?” What story might you be telling yourself to justify your feeling that technical expertise and not people skills is all that matters in how you deal with folks at work?
• How do you feel about the idea that “soft skills” are so important to defining your career as a successful leader?
• On a scale of 1-10, where does your boss lie when it comes to his/her people skills? If on the low end, how does this affect your relationship with him/her? Is having effective people-skills considered a core competency in your organization?
• Do you consider yourself a “people person”? Would you consider yourself a role model as one who uses people skills effectively? Would others agree with you?
• Do you ever think about habits you have that may cause your co-workers to disengage from you or not want to work with you? Do you ever ask for feedback, formally or informally? Are you afraid of what you might hear?
• Do you ever ask folks for their opinions, advice or suggestions and then argue with them when their input is not what you want to hear? If you are successful, do you believe your success is a justification for the way you behave—or are you successful in spite of it? Do you know the difference?
• Do money, status, power and popularity get in the way of your experiencing healthy, conscious relationships at work?
• Are you ever curious about how people perceive you? Do you ever consider how your actions form others’ perceptions?

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